Friday, October 3, 2014

The 5.9% Unemployment Lie of Obama

Posted by Stranded in Sonoma

It's getting close to election time so you can be sure of two things: the rhetoric will heat UP and the unemployment rate will go DOWN. Like gasoline prices, you can pretty much tell when they will go up (just before the summer vacation driving season) and when they will go down (just after the summer vacation driving season).

Tuesday November 4, 2014 is mid-term election day and the official unemployment rate for September is down to 5.9%. And it took a pretty good jump too from a high of 6.7% in March to 6.1% in August. Now, Obama and the democrat party can crow about unemployment in the fives. Except there's one slightly MASSIVE problem with that rate — it's a lie.

Look at the this graph from Shadow I will be calling your attention to this graph again.

Shadow Stats is a website devoted to exposing the lie about any economic recovery claimed by the government. The proprietor is a Mr. John Williams and he does NOT make this up. He gets his data straight from the Bureau of Labor Statistics. The only difference is, he doesn't put lipstick on this pig of the Obama Economy. Look at the graph again and you will notice two very telling things. The most obvious is that for as long as Obama has been in the White House, the unemployment rate has never fallen below 20%! So you can forget the taurusfimus from Obama's apologists in the liberal press telling us that "recovery is right around the corner." That must be one helluva corner because we've been going around it since 2010.

The other thing that is quite noticeable is the trend. The graph goes back 20 years to 1994. Look at the trend between the government lie of the official unemployment rate (the bottom track), the median rate (the middle track), and the actual unemployment rate (the upper track). You will notice that when Bill Clinton was lying about the unemployment rate in the 1990s, the government lie of the "official" unemployment rate track "paralleled" the true unemployment rate almost perfectly. In the year after 9-11 when Bush43 got tax rates cut that provided business with the stimulus of less money going to the government, the true unemployment rate went down again and the government lie "paralleled" it yet again. Even when the Bill Clinton-caused mortgage fiasco hit in 2007-2008, the rates again "paralleled" each other.

Then Obama happened — and something changed. Starting in 2009, the "official" government lie of the unemployment rate STOPPED "paralleling" the true unemployment rate and has slowly been creeping downward while the true unemployment rate has remained somewhere near 22-23 percent for Obama's entire reign of error. This is NOT some accident of numbers. Someone didn't fat-finger the numeric ten key on their keyboard for 5 years running. This was blatantly intentional! Yes, when Clinton and Bush43 lied about the unemployment rate it was also intentional. But their crime was to just understate the true unemployment rate by about 8%. NOT Obama! He is not understating anything. He is willfully misrepresenting the unemployment rate by a whopping 17%! As BigFurHat said on his blog I Own The World, "If the melanin shield erected around Obama by the progressive press was dropped, Obama would be considered the worst president in the history of our nation."

When Carter's unemployment rate was sky high, Ronald Reagan cared enough about those unemployed to actually work with the democrat majority in both the House and the Senate to get taxes cut and get the economy going. Barack Obama cares about no one except Barack Obama.


Friday, September 26, 2014

Obama = Nixon

Posted by Stranded in Sonoma

Read the first paragraph from this article. Then come back here.

U.S. District Court Judge John Sirica John D. Bates has denied a request from the Oval Office Department of Justice to quash the subpoena delay the release of a list of Watergate Operation Fast and Furious documents being protected under President Nixon’s Obama’s assertion of executive privilege.

You know Obama is an inept, incompetent, ignorant president when the conservative press just has to recycle all of the communiqués by the liberal press from the Nixon administration. Too bad the liberal press doesn't realize what's going on. Or maybe they do and have just become jaded about Obama and do nothing for fear of being called racists by their liberal "journalist" brethren.


Sunday, August 17, 2014

Accidental Racism

Posted by Stranded in Sonoma

Watch this video and see if you can Spot the Accidental Racism!

Did you see it? Of course you didn't. You can't, because only a liberal can spot accidental racism. Intelligent people know there is no such thing. All racism is intentional such as the democrats passing the Fugitive Slave Act in the 1850s or the democrats doing all they could to keep slavery alive before the Civil War or the democrats voting against the 13th, 14th, and 15th amendments or the democrats creating the Ku Klux Klan or in the late 19th century, the democrats repealing the civil rights legislation passed by the Republicans or the democrats passing the Jim Crow laws or the democrats lynching blacks or the democrats voting against making lynching a federal crime or the democrats filibustering the civil rights legislation of the mid 1950s or the democrats attacking the civil rights marchers in the late 50s and through the 60s or the passage of democrat LBJ's "Great Society" which has led to the destruction of the black family.

Yeah, I'm pretty sure ALL racism is intentional.

Wednesday, May 21, 2014

Obamacare Survivor

Posted by Stranded in Sonoma

Well, another season of Survivor is in the books. Personally, I don't watch it. As I understand it, the guy that everybody hated was the winner. So I guess it's like the last two presidential elections.

And speaking of inept, incompetent, and ignorant anti-American, muslim, marxist, leninist, socialists — Obama's signature legislation, Obamacare, keeps claiming more and more victims. Millions of people have lost healthcare plans that the democrats claimed they would get to keep. Mind you, those healthcare plans were what the people liked, not what the government liked. So they had to go. It's a shame that the press doesn't report more thoroughly on this. They'd rather just take the talking points from Jay Carney and report the lies, breathlessly!, about how Obamacare is working.

If the number of people that have been thrown off of their healthcare plans were spoken about, to the same extent and with the same degree of interest as those that are thrown off of Survivor, the democrats would not win a single seat in the elections this November.


Saturday, May 3, 2014

My Day Shopping...or...the Outlets to My Frustration

Posted by Stranded in Sonoma

Today, my wife decided that we needed to take a field trip. Well...a shopping trip. Nothing wrong with that except she wanted to go to the Vacaville Outlet Stores. That's a 60+ mile trip from our house and in the ObamaEconomy, gas is at $4.25 per gallon and rising. That type of frivolity can add up fast. I relented because I thought it would be good to see what type of prices the "outlet" stores have. I mean, they are "outlet" stores with the goods straight from the maker so the prices should be lower...right? That was my first mistake. Believing that outlet stores have lower prices. I'll have more to say about the prices later.

Let's start at the beginning. We parked the car and started our walk around the stores. This was the first thing I saw. Yes, those are electric car charging stations. But not just ANY electric car. They are TESLA electric car chargers. Which means that TESLA has somehow convinced the management at the Vacaville Outlet Stores to allow people to recharge their non polluting, green, eco-friendly, Gaia-loving, non genetically engineered electric cars on the people's dime! The people? Well, who do YOU think is paying for the electricity? These are NOT kiosks that have a payment method included.

I walked all around these charging stations and the only thing there, is the portal-like stand with a TESLA-specific charging handle. I found no way to make a payment. Which means that the electricity used is charged by PG&E to the outlet stores management who passes it on in rental and other costs to the stores who pass it on in the form of higher prices to the consumers. Wonderful. And I know you know this: the electricity is created by burning coal or from nuclear power plants. So these cars are NOT eco-friendly. At least by the standards that liberals themselves have set. Not for THEMselves. For everyone ELSE. I was thinking this was NOT the way to start a day shopping but I figured if it started out at the bottom, it HAD to get better. It HAS to get better...doesn't it? Please?

Not really. The prices were just as, if not more, expensive as if we were shopping close to home. One of the stores is called Restoration Hardware. It has nothing to do with restorations and it doesn't stock any hardware. It's a furniture store. An upscale furniture store. An expensive upscale furniture store. A VERY expensive upscale furniture store. There was a wood dining room table. For $3,552. I think it was teak. It had damn well better have been teak and the nuts and bolts should have been solid gold. But it was just a wood table. Just. A. Wood. Table. This was NOT some one-off piece of furniture created by Norm Abram at The New Yankee Workshop. It was just a wood table. A $3,552 wood table.

We also visited a store called Coach. Silly me! I thought it was a sporting goods store! It's a lady's handbag store. Though I'm fairly certain that the male-looking employees have male DNA, I just don't know if they put it to use with the ladies. Not that there's anything wrong with that. Here is a sample of the wares in the store called Coach.

Guess what the price is for this handbag? No, you're wrong. You're still wrong. Nope. Not even getting warm. That handbag is exactly what you see. One piece of outer material with holes in it and no lining. It costs $400. Yes. It. Does. There are many things to buy worth $400 but the key word here is "worth." This looks like some grandmother glued all her doilies together and put handles on it. Jeebus!

By this time, my feet were hurting a bit and I wanted to sit down for a few minutes. We found a food court that served coffee drinks. I ordered just a coffee. My wife ordered an iced caramel macchiato. She also got a coffee — with something in it that gave it a coffe-and-cream color. When she complained, the girl put some ice in a clear plastic cup and poured my wife's coffee over it. All of the ice melted. So my wife had to add more ice to cool it to the temperature of an iced coffee drink. Think of the weakest coffee you have ever tasted. It was weaker than that.

We finally decided to call it quits and go home. On our way to the freeway, we saw an Amichi's restaurant in the Nut Tree center. So we pulled in and had a late pizza lunch. I had the Amichi's combo and my wife had something that I wouldn't eat but she liked. And I liked my pizza too. It was OUTSTANDING! The Alley Cat Pale Ale went perfectly with the pizza. It ended the shopping trip on an up note.

Well, what ended the trip on an up note was when we got in the car to go home. I spotted this bumper loaded with a few stickers. At first I thought, "California. What liberal message will be on these?" Then I looked closer. WOO-HOO! Yes-sir-ree! A real American in California. Wow! Thank you, sir. I really miss President Reagan too. Our last REAL president. Thank you for supporting our 2nd Amendment rights and for supporting MagPul as well. It sure made the trip home much better!


Friday, December 20, 2013

I've finally got a job!!!

Posted by Stranded in Sonoma

After two years and two months of being one of Obama's unexpected, I am now a member of the employed. I've been working since December 2nd but I wanted to wait to pass along the news until I got my first paycheck. I guess that kind of makes it real. I'm sure some of you have noticed I'm not around much. Or, maybe you haven't!

It's strange to be working again after 2 years of looking for work. Which is a job in itself. For my entire life, I had never been out of a job for longer than 3-4 weeks. My wife once told me when a previous employer went out of business, "I don't worry about you being out of work because you always find a job so quickly." That time, I found a job just 3 weeks later.

But this time it's different. We have a brain-dead, knuckle-dragging, mouth-breathing socialist in the White House who couldn't care about the unemployed. I remember when Ronald Reagan was president. He CARED that people were unemployed. So much so that he went to the mat for the unemployed and got taxes cut, even though both houses of congress were run by the democrats. When those tax cuts took effect, the unemployment rate dropped. But Obama cares so little about the working people who are the backbone of this country. And while I'm not sure who the brain is, I sure know who the rectum is.

As for my job, it's very good and I do like it. I am learning a lot about the medical profession and medical terminology. And even though it is not in my chosen career path, it is a solid job that has allowed me to get my foot in the door. However, in ObamaLand you no longer have a career -- you have a job. And this one is $20 an hour less than what I was making. But it's in town so my commute is minutes instead of hours and the team I work with makes the job worth so much more. For me, the glass is half FULL!

But, there is one thing I will continue to do. If I am ever polled again by a national polling agency, I am unemployed but still looking for work. That way, the unemployment rate cannot go down because of me. As a matter of fact, it should go up. If Obama is cooking the employment books, then I can lie about my status as unemployed. And all of you should as well. Never give Obama that satisfaction. He is doing nothing to help the unemployed. We should do nothing to help him.


Thursday, November 21, 2013

Even with Oswald, it's still a conspiracy

Posted by Stranded in Sonoma

Picture yourself as a "lone gunman" who has military experience. You are getting help from NO ONE. That is the definition of lone gunman; even the smallest amount of assistance from one other person means conspiracy. (One quick side note here. During the Warren Commission hearings, the first thing that former CIA Chief Allen Dulles did was to try to convince the other members that all other presidential assassination attempts, successful or not, had been done by a "lone gunman." One of the commissioners asked about the Lincoln assassination citing 100 years of history books that proved there were four conspirators. Dulles claimed that John Wilkes Booth was such a forceful personality and did most of the work, it was in essence, the work of a lone gunman. Someone then asked about the assassination attempt by multiple Puerto Rican nationalists on President Truman that had happened just over 10 years before. Again, Dulles, not wanting to admit to a conspiracy said the multiple shooters were so focused on just one goal, it was a "lone gunman." You can see that even with 100 years of evidence against him, Dulles was trying, at the earliest possible date, to keep the commission from finding a conspiracy. Back to the narrative.)

The only thing that matters to you is WHERE you are shooting FROM. Your perch is everything. Wrong shooting perch, ineffective assassination. Your shooting platform also decides which type of gun you will use. If your target is a mile away, you'd probably want to use a Barret .50 Caliber. On the other hand, if you're going to be rubbing shoulders with your target, a .38 caliber snub-nose revolver will do. You certainly wouldn't use the Barrett up close or the .38 at long distance. And you can't just make a stupid GUESS about from where you will shoot. You must reason out the best spot to shoot from. Since the president is visiting Dallas, you would rightly assume he will pass through Dealey Plaza (the birthplace of Dallas).

You look at Dealey Plaza. Houston Street borders it on the East (the top of the linked photo) and the Triple Overpass on the West (bottom of the photo). Elm Street is the Northern border and Commerce Street is the Southern border (Elm is one-way East to West and Commerce is one-way West to East). It is bisected by Main Street running East/West (top to bottom in the photo). You see it is a mirror image, North/South. You know the president will land at Love Field which is Northwest of Dealey Plaza. So there are a few directions the motorcade may take. However, the president is set to visit the Dallas Trade Mart which is located on the Stemmons Freeway. So, the best direction for him to come would seem to be South on Houston, a shallow right on Elm, under the Triple Overpass, and then off to the Stemmons Freeway. So you get a job at the only business available on the East side of the plaza -- the Texas School Book Depository -- to position yourself for a shot coming down Houston and turning onto Elm. All other buildings surrounding the plaza are gov't buildings.

Then you see a problem. If the motorcade comes down Main Street and just keeps on going, the limo will be way out of range of the TSBD. Of course, if the motorcade turns North on Houston you get a shot at the president coming right at you. If the motorcade then turns onto Elm, you'll get a shot of him going away from you. Sounds good, but Secret Service regulations forbid the presidential limo from making a turn of more than 45 degrees or dropping speed below 45 mph. If the motorcade turned North on Houston from Main and then West on Elm from Houston, they would be committing four separate violations of Secret Service regulations in the space of one city block. You know that ain't gonna happen and as a lone gunman having to rely only on yourself, you're not going to count on THAT much luck. So you need to find a perch where you will have the best possible shot whichever direction the motorcade takes.

You look at the Triple Overpass. All three roads converge under it (Elm, Main, and Commerce, North to South). As the convergence comes out the other side, there is a convenient on-ramp to the Stemmons Freeway whether you take Elm or Main. If you place yourself between Elm and Main on the Triple Overpass, you can shift your shooting angle between the two, depending on which way the motorcade comes. It doesn't matter if they come down Houston and turn onto Elm or come straight down Main (neither of which violates regulations). Even if they DO violate regulations and come down Main, turn on Houston and then on Elm, you STILL get a shot. And the best part of the Triple Overpass is that the presidential limo is coming to YOU! Which means you don't need a 30-06 or a .308 hunting rifle. The target will be closing toward your position. You can use a less expensive rifle with less powerful ammunition because you're not having to make the adjustments as the target gets farther away. In case you're interested, the Mannlicher-Carcano rifle (6.5mm rounds) retailed for just about $20.00, mail order. If the president comes through Dealey Plaza (very likely) and needs to end up at the Dallas Trade Mart, the best place to be to assassinate him is the Triple Overpass.

However, you choose the TSBD because you're hoping he will come down Houston and turn onto Elm and just chance it that he won't come down Main. So you setup your "sniper's nest" on the 6th floor of the TSBD and wait for the motorcade. You see it's heading West on Main toward the plaza and your heart drops. Then it inexplicably turns onto Houston and then on Elm and you have your shot! How LUCKY can you be?! You counted on the wildest luck to have the Secret Service violate its own regulations and it happened! You take your shot while the limo is practically stopped on Elm and you kill the president. Then your dream is over and ends in complete failure because while headed West on Main Street, the president leans forward towards the driver and says, "Driver, don't turn right here. Just continue strait through the plaza."

The only way that Oswald would choose the TSBD is because he was TOLD to be there. He filled out the job application to work at the TSBD just 38 days before the assassination. He KNEW the Secret Service would violate regulations, because that is the kind of "luck" you DON'T count on. He KNEW the route in advance. He HAD to because there is NO REASON that a lone gunman would choose the TSBD if the route could have been Main Street, straight through the plaza, which would screw his shooting solution to hell. The TSBD makes NO SENSE for a lone gunman, reasoning out the best possible shooting position, because it is one of the worst assassination positions possible. While on the other hand, the Triple Overpass is the near perfect shooting perch because it gave him the best shooting position no matter which way the motorcade took. If you get Oswald as the shooter, it's still a conspiracy.

Monday, August 26, 2013

Hope and Change — I've heard that somewhere before...

Posted by Stranded in Sonoma

Looks like Obama's message isn't even a good idea to the hollyweird script writers whose job it is to write about the future!




Tuesday, August 6, 2013

I'm important!

Posted by Stranded in Sonoma

No, not im-PO-tent, im-POR-tant.

I would like to thank Marooned in Marin for recognizing me as one of the web's Most Influential Bloggers. Wow. It's a bit of a weight but it is something all of us conservative bloggers know we are capable of carrying. We take our cue from good people like Andrew Breitbart who gave the liberals what we conservatives have had to take for so long. They hated it, but you knew Andrew had won, the day of Anthony Weiner's press conference. Weiner refused to show and Andrew was just in the crowd to ask questions. A few in the old media started asking Andrew questions and pretty soon he was on stage and it was HIS press conference and he made sure everyone knew the truth. I would have loved to have seen Andrew Breitbart sink his teeth into Obama's Benghazi policy. (I refuse to call them scandals. They are POLICY. A scandal is when you are found in bed with a dead woman or a live man.)

This is not a suck up but when I first read Marooned in Marin I realized that was something I could do as well. Living just north in Sonoma County there were many local issues I wanted to cover. I keep telling myself I'll give up much of the national coverage and dig into the local California and North Bay issues. I keep telling myself that.

As for the recognition, I have been tasked with answering 7 questions. Here they are.

1. What shaped your current political philosophy?

I was in high school during the Watergate hearings and I remember that my mother was SO angry because they pre-empted Jeopardy! to show the hearings. She hated that and was very adamant about her distaste for the democrat showboating. Especially over a case of misdemeanor breaking and entering. However, as the hearings progressed, more information about Nixon was revealed. His proclivity for abuse of the IRS investigative power really angered me. Then in my senior year we had to take Government as a graduation requirement. The teacher told us of how FDR used to read the tax returns of prominent people and have the IRS investigate people he didn't like. The way she said it was so flippant as if "All presidents do this." That's when I questioned the entire reason for the Watergate hearings. Why investigate a misdemeanor and it's cover up and then act so sanctimonious about the IRS investigations of Nixon when FDR did the same thing and that was no big deal? It's okay for democrats but not Republicans? You can see I was fighting the liberal indoctrination early.

Then I read a book called MiG Pilot: The Final Escape of Lieutenant Belenko by John Barron. In it, Victor Belenko tells of how as The New Soviet Man, he was shown some movies of bread and soup lines in the United States. He later found out they were from 1935-era depression newsreels even though he was told that this was a typical occurrence in every day America in the mid 1960s. Then, he did something that he told no one about: he asked a question to himself. He asked, "Okay, those are bread lines. But who owns all those cars I see parked and driving in the background?" Oooops! He realized the fallacy of liberal socialism because its propaganda cannot stand up to the simplest of scrutiny.

That's when I started asking questions of democrat policy and found they were no different than the socialism that Mr. Belenko questioned. And those democrat policies wilted before the simplest of questions. I had already voted for Gerald Ford in 1976 and this just solidified my vote for Ronald Reagan in 1980. I have voted Republican ever since and consider myself a conservative. A proud conservative.

2. Do you see a resurgence of the Tea Party movement before the 2014 mid-term elections? Why or why not?

No, I do not. The press in this country is very good at showing the LoFo's (low information voters) just what they want them to see. In the Zimmerman case, the police had all of the raw evidence and refused to charge Mr. Zimmerman because they knew it wasn't murder. However, the PRESS had the same raw evidence, but ALTERED it to make it look like Mr. Zimmerman was a racist and eventually got Obama/Jarret/Holder involved. Those three got the police chief removed and replaced with someone more "compliant." Then Mr. Zimmerman was charged with murder. The press will just send their attack dogs after the Tea Party, lie about what they are, and the LoFo's will come out in force to stop them — against their own best interests. The Tea Party will still be there but we'll lose the House because RINOs like John Boehner hate the Tea Party and he will help the democrats win.

3. What is the most unreported political story that is being ignored by the “mainstream” media?

I would have to say the policy of Obama/Jarrett to use the IRS as a political hammer. When Nixon did it, they thought it was bad. When Obama got caught doing it, it was a phony scandal. What the old media isn't doing is looking at the history of presidents doing this. For the last 100 years, practically every president (and certainly every democrat president) has used the IRS to attack his political opponents. This will never stop as long as the income tax remains. The only reason the IRS does this is because they can do this. Their mere existence gives unscrupulous presidents the ability to hammer their political opponents. If you want this to stop, you have to repeal the 16th amendment and gut the IRS. If you don't want to repeal the 16th amendment and don't want to gut the IRS, then you approve of presidents using them for deceitful and unethical actions. There is no middle ground here; either you abhor Gestapo-esque tactics or you approve of them.

4. Who do you see as a rising conservative name to watch?

Difficult, due to the fact that the GOP will always pick the biggest RINO and he will get the lion's share of money and advertising that will bury a conservative. Here in California, most Republicans are pretty squishy. So, I'll choose Nancy Mace of South Carolina. This is just an initial look and an opinion based on printed information. Read her bio. She sounds like a good conservative choice for South Carolina. Because Lindsey Graham is anything but that.

5. What do you do like to do away from blogging/political activism?

In no particular order: Photography. Cars. Airplanes. Music. Old movies.

6. Which do you prefer: Beach or Mountains?

Beach. There is nothing better than sharing a sunset over the Pacific Ocean with a special someone while listening to great music.

7. What is a quote you like to live by?

Live in such a way that you would not be ashamed to sell your parrot to the town gossip.
— Will Rogers

Now, in keeping with the tradition, I will choose some bloggers that I respect and admire. Followed by the 7 dreaded questions they must answer.

Merry Poppet

Dianny, at All the Right Snark

Victory Girls

Okay, Ladies. Here are the rules.

1. Display the award logo on your blog.

2. Link back to the person who nominated you.

3. Answer 7 questions decided upon by your nominator.

4. Nominate (no limit of nominations) other bloggers for this award and link back to them.

5. Notify those bloggers of the award requirements.

Now you have to answer these seven questions and nominate other worthy bloggers.

1. If you could interview anyone, alive or dead, who would it be and why?

2. If Hillary Clinton gets the 2016 nomination, who will be her running mate?

3. Who is your early pick for the 2016 Republican nomination?

4. Will Valerie Jarrett ever be subpoenaed by Congress to testify? Why or why not?

5. Who is your personal hero and why?

6. If you could write the definitive history of the Obama administration, name the book and write a (short) prologue.

7. Beans and Franks or Quiche and Salad?

If you want to make the prologue longer, that's fine. If you want to write the entire book, that's fine too! I'll buy a copy!  


Monday, August 5, 2013

Big LoFo Brother

Posted by Stranded in Sonoma

Oh, geez! It's Big Brother time again! How do you spell the sound you make when you projectile vomit?

These low information brain donors are worse than useless. They take time away from my TV viewing pleasure. My wife loves to watch it and I'm not sure why. So when I walk downstairs, I have to be subjected to a bunch of bratty LoFo Obama voters tell everyone their strategy to win...a game that will change their life not one whit because they will squander any winnings by donating it all to Planned Parenthood. It's a shame more donations weren't given to Planned Parenthood about 25 years ago.

Whenever any of these clods speaks (I'm still not sure it's English they're speaking) it's as if someone took a three-pronged garden rake and dragged it across a chalkboard. Thank God I keep the Tylenol downstairs. All I'm trying to do is get a bite to eat or something to drink and I'm subjected to some rocket surgeon tell me in all of their breathless detail who they plan on removing from the game. Then the shot is cut to a few of the Obama voters conspiring as to their (use your best deep announcer's voice here), Grand Strategy! Whenever I see that, all I can think about is the video below. Just put them and this "show" out of my misery.



Thursday, July 25, 2013

That's America!

Posted by Stranded in Sonoma

1 — You're a woman and you see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him and say, "I'm fantastic in bed." That's Direct Marketing.

2 — You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a handsome guy. One of your friends goes up to him and, pointing at you, says, "She's fantastic in bed." That's Advertising.

3 — You see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him and get his telephone number. The next day you call and say, "Hi, I'm fantastic in bed." That's Telemarketing.

4 — You see a guy at a party; you straighten your dress, walk up to him and pour him a drink. You say, "May I?" and reach up to straighten his tie, brushing your breast lightly against his arm, and then you add, "By the way, I'm fantastic in bed." That's Public Relations.

5 — You're at a party and see a handsome guy. He walks up to you and says, "I hear you're fantastic in bed." That's Brand Recognition.

6 — You're at a party and see a handsome guy. He fancies you, but you talk him into going home with your friend. That's a Sales Rep.

7 — Your friend can't satisfy him so he calls you. That's Tech Support.

8 — You're on your way to a party when you realize that there could be handsome men in all these houses you're passing, so you climb onto the car's roof and shout at the top of your lungs, "I'm fantastic in bed!" That's Junk Mail.

9 — You are at a party and this distinguished man walks up to you and grabs your ass. That's Bill Clinton.

10 — You liked it, but twenty years later your attorney decides you were offended.
That's America!


Sunday, July 14, 2013

We, the Jury, find the defendant...

Posted by Stranded in Sonoma

In wake of the not guilty verdict in the trial of George Zimmerman, I have a few observations I'd like to make. I know that opinions are like assholes, everybody has one. But I believe this needs to be said, if for no other reason than to cover the jury's 6.

George Zimmerman, a Latino, was charged with the 2nd degree murder of Trayvon Martin, a black man. Mr. Martin was 17 years old, stood 6'2" and weighed 160 pounds. He played high school football. The press would have you believe that Trayvon was a child of 12 years when he was killed. No. Mr. Martin was NOT a child. He was NOT 12 years old. Look at this photo. You will see Mr. Zimmerman's broken and bloody nose from Mr. Martin repeatedly striking his face and the injuries to the back of his head from Mr. Martin slamming his head onto the ground. Had that beating continued, Mr. Zimmerman would have died and Mr. Martin would have been tried as an adult for murder. Do not forget that fact.

If you read any impartial account of the trial or watched any of the proceedings on television, you would know that the prosecution failed miserably to prove its case. The prosecution witnesses were far from credible and in most instances their testimony was easily torn apart by the defense. We've all seen the video of Rachel Jeantel on the witness stand during cross examination by the defense, telling everyone that she cannot read cursive, even though the note she was reading was supposedly penned by her. Then, the prosecution even admitted that she lied. This was pretty much the direction the prosecution's case took.

But the gist of this post is about the jury. The six women on that jury had to weigh all of the evidence brought by the prosecution. They had to determine if the prosecution proved 2nd degree murder and, according to the judge's instructions to the jury, they had to weigh the evidence against a possible last second invention of a charge of manslaughter brought by the judge. When all was said and done, the jury refused to convict. They stood their ground and brought back the only verdict possible. They understood that Mr. Zimmerman was innocent until proven guilty and the prosecution proved nothing. Despite the sequestration of the jury, they knew how racially charged this trial was. How could they not? They could see Mr. Zimmerman at the defense table and I'm sure they wondered how the press could call him a White Hispanic when it is clear looking at him that he is Latino. Why say "White" Hispanic? Why not just say "Hispanic" or more correctly, "Latino?"

Even with all of that the jury had one more thing with which to contend. Over the last 10 years there have been no end of stories of how someone's personal information (address, phone numbers, etc.) was published on the web. These people were harassed and intimidated. They were threatened with violence up to and including death. There is no way the jury could have NOT been aware of these instances of the worst Gestapo-esque tactics. They were in the news month after month. They knew that there was a possibility that their OWN personal information could be leaked to the web and that they could receive the same intimidation and the same threats of violence. Yet, they still had the courage to find Mr. Zimmerman not guilty! If nothing else proves the prosecution's case was the weakest of the weak, that one thing does!

When Jason Collins, a player in the NBA, said he was a homosexual, his "coming out" was hailed as "courageous." Bullshit. Telling everyone that you enjoy fecal intercourse is not courageous. Bringing back a verdict of not guilty when you are possibly under the threat of physical violence for doing so, IS courageous. It is called doing the right thing in the face of adversity. Mr. Collins is going to get a multi million dollar endorsement from Nike for saying he is a homosexual. Yeah, facing that kind of adversity must have made Mr. Collin's decision a difficult one. The press will never understand the stress that the Zimmerman jury went through to bring in a not guilty verdict in the face of all of the race-baiting, all of the possible personal information leaks, all of the knowledge that they could become victims of liberal hate. But they did the right thing and said, "Not guilty on all counts."

Now, that's courage.  


Wednesday, July 3, 2013

We are MEN.

Posted by Stranded in Sonoma

Ladies, remember these rules about men. They are numbered for convenience.

1. Men are NOT mind readers.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.
1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like the guys on your favorite soap opera.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
1. You can either ask us to do something - OR - tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is a vegetable. We have no idea what Mauve is.
1. If it itches, it WILL be scratched. We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say, "Nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, then you should expect an answer you don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear IS fine...really.
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as the counter trey, the shotgun formation, or the zone defense.
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; but did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.


Wednesday, June 19, 2013


Posted by Stranded in Sonoma

Today, June 19, 2013, my kitty cat Hazel died.

Hazel (because of her hazel-colored eyes) had been suffering from chylothorax (fluid around the lungs) for about 2 months. It was difficult for her to take normal breaths. We could often see her breathing in little puffs around her abdomen. When we took her to the vet, we found that she also had a hyperthyroid condition and had diabetes as well. The vet drained about 80% of the fluid from around her lungs and she got much better quickly. The prescribed treatment to combat the chylothorax is a low-fat diet and an enzyme called Rutin. Unfortunately, the Rutin had to be pulverized from a pill and put into her food. She refused to eat any food with the Rutin in it and she got steadily worse. There is no liquid form of Rutin and the pills, even cut in half, are quite large and difficult to get her to swallow. We realized that we would have to continue to pay to have the fluid drained every 2-3 weeks.

After much soul searching, my wife and I decided that even if we were able to solve the chylothorax problem, there was still the hyperthyroid and diabetes to contend with. We realized that her quality of life would be quite limited and we didn't want to wait until it was too late. We just couldn't see her suffer any longer. Besides, Hazel was 16 years old and had led a pretty good life — for a cat.

We got Hazel and her sister, Corky (real name: Corkscrew) from our friend in the summer of 1997, whose cat had just had a litter. Both parents were semi-feral and we were a bit worried that the kittens would grow up with a wandering eye for fields afar. We needn't have worried with Hazel. While her sister Corky would be missing for days and even weeks at a time, Hazel was our watch cat. You could always see her on guard duty walking around the top of the fence and protecting our house from birds and snakes and mice. Once, I remember getting up at night to investigate some noise in our garage. When I opened the door, I saw two raccoons going after the cat kibble in a cabinet. (We used to leave the garage door open a bit for the cats.) I tried to get our dog Jasmine (a Black Lab mix) to at least take a few steps into the garage and start barking. No dice. The dog was hiding behind me! Then Hazel stepped lightly into the garage, got up on the hood of our van, puffed up to a slightly impressive size, and stared down the raccoons! I made a noise grabbing a broom and the raccoons left. Hazel, proud of her medal-worthy defense of hearth and home, got down from the van and walked into the house with the quiet assurance of a job well done.

When Hazel was young, she used to play regularly with our dog Jasmine. We would see them playing and Hazel would put her entire head into Jasmine's mouth! Jasmine never bit down and just held Hazel's head lightly in her mouth like she would a retrieved bird. Then she'd let go and the two would start playing again. I would often see one of Hazel's claws caught in the loose skin around Jasmine's mouth. It never seemed to bother the dog and the head-in-the-mouth game would be played again and again. Neither tired of it and it was a source of amazement for the whole family.

One of the funniest things she would do was when you were going to the bathroom. You would be sitting on the toilet and you would hear this scratching at the door. As you opened the door, there sat Hazel, staring at you, in all of your missing dignity. She would walk towards you and look up at you. There was nothing you could do except to scratch her under her chin. It's as if she knew she had a captive audience and that you would give her a little bit of loving to forget about your undignified predicament.

Hazel lived with us at 4 houses, through 3 moves, and 16 years of unconditional love. When we got to the house we live in currently, Corky took off to live down the street because there is a wide open field for her to show off her hunting prowess. She lives with a new family now. As for Hazel, she ran the roost. Our next door neighbors had 3 cats and the cats had had full run of our property for over a year before we got there, without interruption. When Hazel showed up, somehow those other cats just knew that Hazel was in charge. She would be lying on the top of the fence (monorailing), with her back to a neighbor's cat, and she wouldn't flinch a muscle. The other cat would just turn and go back the way it had come. They would start fights with other neighborhood cats, but not with Hazel. Even as she got older, they gave her that type of respect animals seem to reserve for the elderly. Hazel would spend winter nights inside and summer nights outside. She never wandered away. Not once. As her playmate Jasmine's condition deteriorated to the point where she couldn't even climb the stairs (to sleep on her doggie bed at the foot of our bed during the night), Hazel seemed to know something was up. Sometimes, Hazel would spend the night downstairs too.

Then, in November of 2009, after 14 years of love, companionship, smiles, and finally, tears, we had to put Jasmine down. Today, it was Hazel's time. As I drove her to the vet that final time, I tried to catch all of the traffic lights red; just so she could be with me for a few extra precious moments. But I caught them all green. Every one. It's as if He was saying, "It's okay to do this and to do it quickly. You're doing the right thing." I held her in my arms as she passed and I cried, not like a baby, but I sobbed aloud like an adult that feels the loss of a loved one.

Goodbye, Hazel-bayzel. It's time to go play with Jasmine. She is waiting for you there.  


Sunday, June 16, 2013

Mmmm!  Tastes just like Dhimmitude!

Posted by Stranded in Sonoma

Look at the menu to the left. This is from Ike's Place in Santa Rosa. They are all over the Bay Area. The owner is Ike Shehadeh and you would think this is kind of like the American dream. Immigrant opens business, becomes successful and opens more. Maybe that is true.

But so is his menu. There are two types of chicken on the menu — fried chicken and halal chicken. So, if you don't want fried chicken because of health concerns, you are stuck with chicken that has been slaughtered unhygienically according to muzloid rules. The only reason I was at the "restaurant" was because my wife wanted to try it. Trust me, the food is not that good. It's not bad, but it's not good. It was average. I had a meatball sandwich. I've had better and I've had worse. So Ike's wasn't anything special.

Now, in all fairness to Ike, he serves...bacon! So, there is that. But the name of that sandwich! The Backstabber? What the hell is up with that? Is that some warning to us infidels about how we'd better be watching our backs? Sorry Ike, but no dice. I'll just make my own chicken sandwich at home.